Pregnancy with arthritis

During my early to mid-20's, many of my friends had begun to settle down, get married and started having a family. I was still drinking and dancing on tables of a weekend (ok, week day too) and had no interest in any of that.

I met my now husband when I was 28 years old, and whilst we married just three years later, I had never been especially broody.

Fate took away much of that decision for a large part of my adult life as I'd been diagnosed with a hip condition called femoral retroversion. I've had surgeries to both my hips and knees in 2013, 2014, 2015, two in 2019, and during lockdown in the infamous 2020.

Any ideas of starting a family were taken away from me. In between surgeries there were countless scans, steroid injections and various medications. 

I was asked "when are you two having babies" multiple times over the years. One such occasion being during the evening on our wedding day - whilst still stood in my ivory taffeta dress! But as the years went by, most of our family and friends began to realise it just wasn't on the cards for us.

The condition I have seems to be hereditary, although I'm the only one to suffer any sort of joint problems at a young age. It could be down to the fact I used to run a lot, or I belong to the milkman.

Either way, wondering about whether I could pass on these shitty genes has been on my mind whenever the subject came up.

In 2021 I had come to the end of the surgical road. Aside from joint replacements, there was nothing more that could be done to preserve my own hip and knee joints. Pain management was now my only route.

Late last year we moved house to a little village in the countryside and have two cheeky Jack Russell terriers. We had our little family - but at the ripe old age of 38, I finally felt like something was missing. Was now the right time? I wasn't getting any younger so time wasn't exactly on my side.

I was on a lot of medication, so I called my GP for advice. She kindly reminded me (multiple times) of my age and if it was what we both wanted, we shouldn't hang about. It's like to take around 12 months, she said...!

3 months later, I began to feel incredibly ill. After two negative Covid tests, I dug out a pregnancy test I'd had to hand from the drawer and within minutes, PREGNANT!! SHIT!

This is a point that my incredibly fertile husband likes to take full credit for. It in no way had anything to do with my egg input.

My GP was also surprised but we came up with plan to tailor off my medication as quickly and safely as possible. 

I am now 5 months pregnant and Tiny Dancer as they've been aptly named is kicking away as I type this. I have never exactly been skinny, even as a child, but women in my family don't seem to contain small bumps and it is ever growing at great speed now! 

Naturally, due to my disability, I am concerned about how my body will cope with the last few months of pregnancy in particular. My hips and knees are not happy, when have they ever been, but they're about to be put under pressure from a few extra stone. 

My right knee is winning in the 'which joint is more of a dick' race and I was ironically due a steroid injection one week after conception. Sadly, it's not allowed during pregnancy.

But there women all over the world doing this with a disability, right? I could do this?

I have had countless discussions with my consultants and physios, and whilst a natural birth is possible, the safest option for my joints would be to deliver my C-section, which most definitely reminds me of a scene from Alien but it wasn't a decision I'd made lightly.

I am hoping Tiny Dancer doesn't inherit many of my genes - OK, maybe my patience. Please don't have my husband's patience.