Me, myself & the NHS

Painkillers, friend or foe? I know lots of friends who shy away from painkillers, why mask the pain your body is trying to tell you it's in? I used to be one of those people too. I'd taken paracetamol in the past, even the ones containing caffeine ("ooh slow down", I hear you cry) but that was all. I had my first knee operation in 2013, despite being in a lot of pain leading up to it, I still only took paracetamol when really necessary. After the operation I was introduced to my first opioid, dihydrocodeine. I remember being prescribed lots of it and a selection of other medication, along with some senna, which the nurse advised was for when it 'backed me up', and she wasn't kidding! I don't think I actually went for a week. I'll spare you the details. I took them for about 5 weeks and cut them down slowly because I was advised they can be addictive. My husband said I was spaced out and babbling rubbish, more than usual. Eventually I wa...

"But you don't look ill" It's a phrase all sufferers have heard. Whether it's out loud or from the looks on their faces. But it's not sympathy or pity we want - it's compassion, understanding and patience; in bucket loads where possible. If you're visibly ill, it's clear to see the pain and suffering you endure each day but there are many illnesses and conditions where the pain is on the inside. We are fighting a silent battle, and most days we hide it well. Not because we want to but because it's the only way we know how. The best comparison I've heard to date is that of an iceberg (and no, not the lettuce). An iceberg has two aspects. The first is clearly visible on the surface, glistening in the sun. The second is the giant mound underneath - so deep and hidden you'd hardly know it was there. We may smile and laugh on the surface, but underneath there’s a pain and agony so fierce that there are no words to describe how we...

I remember dancing in clubs thinking I was Beyoncé, never wanting the night to end and coming to the conclusion that the 4th tequila shot was a good idea after two bottles of wine earlier that evening. Needless to say, at 24 years old, it was beginning to take approximately 4 days to recover from all of the above. I realised I was getting older, but what I didn't realise was my body was going to go all Benjamin Button on me, only in reverse. I'm now 34 years old and after 9 various operations, I will soon embark on a further 2, if I'm lucky.....4 if I'm not. I haven't written a blog before, but I've been told it's an excellent remedy for the complex and troubled mind that only those with chronic pain will understand, and if it somehow connects to other chronic pain sufferers out there, that's a bonus. My life is full of pain killers, muscle relaxants, ice packs and what's worse, I know I'm not alone in this horrid journey. I first start...