Mental Health: The chronic pain journey
My chronic pain journey, like many others, sadly spans over decades, rather than years.
My poor body, has had to endure more procedures and operations, than the Vontrap family might have endured, in an entire lifetime.
I also think I've visited every hospital, within the West Midlands area.
There were even jokes that I should have tour t-shirts made, with all the names of the hospitals and years, printed on the back.
Whilst the majority of hospitals I've visited, have provided great care, there is quite often one aspect missed, mental health awareness.
I have a femoral retroversion. It's a hip condition which I've had from birth.
Fortunately for me, it didn't start to give me symptoms until my early 20's, but it's not something that's easily fixed.
I've been under the care of my local orthopaedic hospital, for around 8 years now. It feels like my second home.
I've had 5 operations there in the last 6 years, and their care has always been brilliant, but there is no visible or verbal information on what to do, if you're struggling mentally.
Whenever I've received my letter, confirming the operation dates, I've then been given information about arthroscopies, what/what not to bring on the day, and some material about general anesthetics.
Equally, when discharged from hospital, you're again given more information, than you can shake a stick at. But still nothing about how isolating this experience can be, or how to look after your mental health, post op.
As you'd imagine, this hospital treats all sort of conditions. There are MRI and CT scanners, X-ray equipment, a hydrotherapy pool, operation theatres, and even a large physio gym. You name it, they have it. But why is mental health ignored?
They seem to be so busy fixing our physical problems, that they don't appear to have the time, or the resources to help?
Thanks to social media, the mental health awareness that has been raised to fight against its stigma, is nothing short of incredible. However, I can't help feeling, these charities are targeted towards general stress, tips for everyday life, and how to cope with major life events, rather than chronic pain conditions or operations.
In my opinion, mental health and chronic pain go hand in hand, so why aren't there any resources within my local orthopaedic hospital?
Over the years, I've joined various Facebook support groups. I have a history of depression, anxiety and self-harm, so I'm aware of just how important, talking about your feelings are. I am not ashamed of what I've been through.
I had therapy in my early 20's, for around 12 months, and it's taught me to try to appreciate the things I can do, rather than dwell on those that I can't. But that's something I've learnt, I don't believe it's a life skill you are born with.
I know that I can no longer run like Forrest Gump, or dance like Beyonce (not that I ever could), but I know that I can do many more things.
As I look around the hospital, waiting for my physio or hydrotherapy sessions, I look at the other patients, sitting quietly.
Many look sad, tired and fed up. They'll go to their appointments, receive their treatment, and go home, but they leave that room with the same helpless expression, and it makes my heart physically ache for them.
I wonder if they have anyone to talk to, how their journey has been to get to this point.
Has it been months, or years? Have they had surgery, or are they still waiting? Or more importantly, are they 'OK'?
I'm currently 3 weeks post op from my 10th operation, left hip. I am most definitely sad, tired and fed up.
Now, this isn't my first rodeo, I know (hope) these feelings will pass. I am pretty much bed bound, and it's an emotional rollercoaster, I wouldn't wish on my worst enemy.
I know I am lucky though, I have a loving dog (and husband), great friends, colleagues, and support groups, I have people I can talk to, but I still worry about that woman in the waiting room, I hope she has someone to help her.
Whilst I'm aware most don't want to talk to me, I'm a complete stranger, I try my best to spark up a conversation if I can, and hope they don't think I'm trying to chat them up.
I nosily ask them why they are there, and see if I can relate. Having had both my knees and hips operated on, usually there's something we have in common at least. The relief on their faces when we do, is priceless!
It's like laughing along to a comedian, when they regale a story and you realise, "oh my god, I do that too!"
Usually at the end of our conversation, I'll show them the support groups I'm in on my phone, and hope I'll see their name pop up later, when they've joined them too.
I've made some great friends in those groups, some of which I speak to regularly. We chat about how we're feeling and put the world to rights. I hope they realise how much they help me.
When I first started writing blogs, it was mainly for selfish reasons. I needed to get my feelings down.
But then I realised, I had actually began to connect with others, they could relate to some of my experiences.
I hope she won't mind this honourable mention, but just recently I had a message from Danielle, a beautiful girl that had read my blogs too. She loved that she'd found someone that had been through the same/similar experiences.
I got the feeling that she has lots of friends, but none of which she feels she could confide in, or that would understand what she's going through, even if she tried.
We've been chatting now for a little over two weeks, she's due hip surgery soon, so I've been filling her in on what to expect, the routine, paper pants an' all.
More importantly, I hope I've made her feel better, knowing I'm there for her, if she needs me.
Whilst I am doing my best to connect to others, to provide support, there shouldn't be this blank space where professional support should be, particularly after surgery.
We could go to the doctors, call up the helplines, but it isn't enough! The mental health support should be coming from within the hospital, at least that's how I feel.
Femoral retroversion, with femoroacetabular impingement, are not common conditions in the UK. Needing this much orthopaedic surgery, in a short space of time, is not common.
Why is no one wondering how I am, mentally? Why should it need to get so bad, that I'm screaming for help, before someone realises there's this blank space?
Why?!
For help,support or more information, on mental health, please go to:
Elefriends or Mind
My poor body, has had to endure more procedures and operations, than the Vontrap family might have endured, in an entire lifetime.
I also think I've visited every hospital, within the West Midlands area.
There were even jokes that I should have tour t-shirts made, with all the names of the hospitals and years, printed on the back.
Whilst the majority of hospitals I've visited, have provided great care, there is quite often one aspect missed, mental health awareness.
I have a femoral retroversion. It's a hip condition which I've had from birth.
Fortunately for me, it didn't start to give me symptoms until my early 20's, but it's not something that's easily fixed.
I've been under the care of my local orthopaedic hospital, for around 8 years now. It feels like my second home.
I've had 5 operations there in the last 6 years, and their care has always been brilliant, but there is no visible or verbal information on what to do, if you're struggling mentally.
Whenever I've received my letter, confirming the operation dates, I've then been given information about arthroscopies, what/what not to bring on the day, and some material about general anesthetics.
Equally, when discharged from hospital, you're again given more information, than you can shake a stick at. But still nothing about how isolating this experience can be, or how to look after your mental health, post op.
As you'd imagine, this hospital treats all sort of conditions. There are MRI and CT scanners, X-ray equipment, a hydrotherapy pool, operation theatres, and even a large physio gym. You name it, they have it. But why is mental health ignored?
They seem to be so busy fixing our physical problems, that they don't appear to have the time, or the resources to help?
Thanks to social media, the mental health awareness that has been raised to fight against its stigma, is nothing short of incredible. However, I can't help feeling, these charities are targeted towards general stress, tips for everyday life, and how to cope with major life events, rather than chronic pain conditions or operations.
In my opinion, mental health and chronic pain go hand in hand, so why aren't there any resources within my local orthopaedic hospital?
Over the years, I've joined various Facebook support groups. I have a history of depression, anxiety and self-harm, so I'm aware of just how important, talking about your feelings are. I am not ashamed of what I've been through.
I had therapy in my early 20's, for around 12 months, and it's taught me to try to appreciate the things I can do, rather than dwell on those that I can't. But that's something I've learnt, I don't believe it's a life skill you are born with.
I know that I can no longer run like Forrest Gump, or dance like Beyonce (not that I ever could), but I know that I can do many more things.
As I look around the hospital, waiting for my physio or hydrotherapy sessions, I look at the other patients, sitting quietly.
Many look sad, tired and fed up. They'll go to their appointments, receive their treatment, and go home, but they leave that room with the same helpless expression, and it makes my heart physically ache for them.
I wonder if they have anyone to talk to, how their journey has been to get to this point.
Has it been months, or years? Have they had surgery, or are they still waiting? Or more importantly, are they 'OK'?
I'm currently 3 weeks post op from my 10th operation, left hip. I am most definitely sad, tired and fed up.
Now, this isn't my first rodeo, I know (hope) these feelings will pass. I am pretty much bed bound, and it's an emotional rollercoaster, I wouldn't wish on my worst enemy.
I know I am lucky though, I have a loving dog (and husband), great friends, colleagues, and support groups, I have people I can talk to, but I still worry about that woman in the waiting room, I hope she has someone to help her.
Whilst I'm aware most don't want to talk to me, I'm a complete stranger, I try my best to spark up a conversation if I can, and hope they don't think I'm trying to chat them up.
I nosily ask them why they are there, and see if I can relate. Having had both my knees and hips operated on, usually there's something we have in common at least. The relief on their faces when we do, is priceless!
It's like laughing along to a comedian, when they regale a story and you realise, "oh my god, I do that too!"
Usually at the end of our conversation, I'll show them the support groups I'm in on my phone, and hope I'll see their name pop up later, when they've joined them too.
I've made some great friends in those groups, some of which I speak to regularly. We chat about how we're feeling and put the world to rights. I hope they realise how much they help me.
When I first started writing blogs, it was mainly for selfish reasons. I needed to get my feelings down.
But then I realised, I had actually began to connect with others, they could relate to some of my experiences.
I hope she won't mind this honourable mention, but just recently I had a message from Danielle, a beautiful girl that had read my blogs too. She loved that she'd found someone that had been through the same/similar experiences.
I got the feeling that she has lots of friends, but none of which she feels she could confide in, or that would understand what she's going through, even if she tried.
We've been chatting now for a little over two weeks, she's due hip surgery soon, so I've been filling her in on what to expect, the routine, paper pants an' all.
More importantly, I hope I've made her feel better, knowing I'm there for her, if she needs me.
Whilst I am doing my best to connect to others, to provide support, there shouldn't be this blank space where professional support should be, particularly after surgery.
We could go to the doctors, call up the helplines, but it isn't enough! The mental health support should be coming from within the hospital, at least that's how I feel.
Femoral retroversion, with femoroacetabular impingement, are not common conditions in the UK. Needing this much orthopaedic surgery, in a short space of time, is not common.
Why is no one wondering how I am, mentally? Why should it need to get so bad, that I'm screaming for help, before someone realises there's this blank space?
Why?!
For help,support or more information, on mental health, please go to:
Elefriends or Mind
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